ENDINGS

dear friends and readers,


my blogging has not come to an end
- but instead grown -
and is in search of other (new) galaxies


blogspot and i love each other dearly
clearly its me and not  him ect.


so,
i begin my new relationship
and further space travels
in a new planet in cyberspace named :


www.yesikastarr.wordpress.com


"Yesika Starr - Astronaut Dare Devil"


hope we continue our torrid love affair there.
i love you. friends. readers. little martians of mine.


i will not delete this blog so that it may remain as a reminder of how sweet individual beginnings can be.


xoxo,
Y.S.

Green Mango Kinda Love

your smile

hesitant like

the sunrise

reluctant like skies

forced to break

to the coming light.

a healing bruise

spread magnificently

over the horizon.

I do not call you by name

instead I seek the familiar ache

the slight twinge of muscles

the sore thought of your face

this is our language

it is tongues

who speak

like arriving

earthquakes.

everything is breaking

but you are always

so fucken beautiful

beneath all this light

you

swinging on a mango tree

skin like burnt sugar canes

hands of marañón

jocote seeds for eyes

singing your song

of volcanoes and oceans

of men who sprouted machetes for limbs

of mothers whose spines coil

like wisps of steam

rising from

pots of boiling beans

you smell like

breath inhaled too deep

like tears soaked into

flor de izote petals

what if I told you

I’ve loved you from the womb,

spoke you as my first word,

remembered you

before we even met?

sonrie my mother said

smile because this will be sent back home

stand up straight

so they can see

how proud you are

live

harder

that anyone else

because there is a place

in our memory

that demands that we do

it is dirt roads

and cows

with lovers eyes

it is banana tree leaves,

gently wrapped tamales,

pupusa vendors,

women with no teeth

and stained aprons

who laugh

as if

beauty

was something

the years give you.

it is boys with shoes

so polished you see

the clouds in them,

unbuttoned shirts

because sun

has a way of

peeling off clothes,

rickety pick up trucks,

baskets carried on heads,

naked babies

sucking on

the greenest

mangoes

you have ever seen.

this is how

how I love you

hypnotized

by the swing

of the hammocks

in your breeze,

adobe wall houses,

red clay tiles,

tin roofs

and brown faces

so beautiful

I stop looking

For the moon

And start searching

For another smile.

It is being so poor

an egg is a luxury

but a stranger at your door

means a banquet

means your last bits of coffee

means your best chair

and coolest corner of your corridor

it is my fathers weather beaten face

staring from the windows of every bus

it is his laughter being peeled

from the branches of the highest

mango trees

es todo lo que se

lo soy

lo fui

my fingertips

the lump in my throat

a silence only god knows

and I love you

this heartbeat

El Salvador

a bruise I hope never heals.

Chinaski's Love Jones

Darling cut me – wide and open
I want your fingernails to touch my bones
Strum a chord with my veins,
Kiss the black and wrinkled organs.

Know me,
Like Christ, my mother
and the Creditors
Do
Learn that
The yellow of teeth and eyes
Are the color of the stars I’d
Sling down for you

I do not sleep
Writing a thousand poems
You will not see

About the way your hair looks
In this dirty light
And how cars honking
remind me of when I first held your hand

we were crossing the light
and you squeezed my fingers
so that one was spilling into the other

and I thought
how nice

if only things
were that simple
for us two.

10 Reasons Why You Are Not Allowed In My Bed Anymore

1.

I grew tired of tying my shadow to your heel

before you disappeared through my window.

2.

Orgasms feel so much better

with direct eye contact

3.

I learned that you sacrificed nothing

by putting up with my weight

but I was the martyr for dealing with your

Dorito’s and stale cigarette breath

4.

there are more positions than doggy style

5.

you never read

the love notes

tucked into

my flesh

6.

I am not in the habit of sleeping with men I do not know

and nine years into this carnal complicity

you no longer are the smiling boy I once adored.

7.

if I wanted to feel like

I gave everything I had to someone who

did not know what to do with it

I would go to Church more often.

8.

I am the moon and you forgot to act accordingly

9.

the last time I held you I thought of jelly fish

10.

I love your memory too much to allow you to soil it.

please stop knocking on my window late nights

remember,

I am the moon

I am full.

No thank you

I have had enough.