Tuesday, February 23, 2010


I am afraid
of the way
this poem
telling more
than my heart
has dared to
tell my mind

foolish and reckless
this poem
comes running
to finger tips
with no answers
just questions
and too many feelings.

who are you and how did you get here?
do you love as easy as you speak?
what magic is your skin made of?
who do I thank for your smile?
for the laughter like rings ?
for you as beautiful as Saturn?

this poem
knows your gravity
the certainty of orbits
turning me into nothing
into everything
into this cliff diver
astronaut dare devil

and you

So beautiful without
just another one of your 52 moons,
watching from a distance
as this poem

and no one is watching
not even my mind
who still thinks
this poem
is about
but falling
for you
and those rings


..your rings

Monday, February 8, 2010


There was a boy I loved more than any other boy
There was a boy who smiled as if smiles where brand new
There was a boy who cried love when there was no love at all
There was a boy I lost as quickly as I found
There was a boy
There was a boy
There was a boy
There will always be a boy worth loving more than the one before

You. Me. & My Self Hate.

don’t worry
you cannot hurt me

i have willing
to bleed myself
dry for you
before I even met you

and i knew
I would disgust you
so I waited for nightfall
to come naked to you
contorting into any position
you need me to be in
holding breath for fear
of panting you away

I don’t expect to be special
to walk down streets holding hands
to meet family members

anything you want
I am willing to give you
my tongue will never lash
and my eyes will always
look the other way

the tears will wait for you to leave
jealousy tucked beneath nails
all of these feelings will remain feelings
and never words you will forced to hear

I will try not to be fat for you
give you shame as an apology
and when I don’t succeed
accept your infidelity as punishment

i am sorry
if you’ve ever
caught a glimpse
of the amazing in me
I know you have no intentions
of ever meeting it
so I try and keep it
under lock and key

I love you
and although you will never understand it
I will say it any chance I get
and if you ever repeat it
I’ll believe you
even if I know
you’ve only said it
to decorate the silence

there is more pain in solitude
than there is in humiliation

i will take whatever you give me
so long as you give me anything
or at least allow me to create something

there is no ending
to this vortex soul of mine

I can see how easy
the amazing in me can get lost

so lost
even I
have lost
complete sight
of it

anything you want
I am willing
to give you

but please
do not
leave me
with myself

to look for.